Category: Parents

Homeschool: Are You the Right Parent for the Job?

3/11/2015

Should Every Parent Homeschool?

by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

Image by ToGa Wanderings via Flickr.com

If you came across this article, chances are you are wondering about homeschooling your child. Are you the right parent for the job? Can any parent teach? Should every parent homeschool? These questions may be running through your mind. As a seasoned parent, homeschool teacher, and advocate for choice in education, perhaps my advice and experience can help you make this difficult and important decision.

What Does it Take to be a Homeschool Teacher?

While I am an advocate for choice in education, including homeschool, I am not going to sugar coat things to entice others to do what I do. I will not tell you that it's easy. If anything, the homeschool choice can make some things more complicated. It takes hard work and dedication from both the parents (and/or homeschool teacher) as well as the children. Though it is not easy, in my opinion, the main things required of a parent are willingness, love, and a commitment to their child's educational needs. I feel any parent with those three things may be the right candidate to be a homeschool parent and teacher.

Do I Need a Teaching Degree to Homeschool?

Because laws can change and because not all states will have the same laws, this is not necessarily a yes or no answer. Check with your state's local school board, as well as homeschool organizations for this information. The Homeschool Legal Defense Association (HSLDA) is also a great place to keep up with legalities and other aspects of homeschool. As for whether or not a parent has the ability to teach without a degree, read "Can a Parent Be a Homeschool Teacher Without a Degree?" for my opinion and research on that matter. In short, the answer is yes, it is possible.

Should All Parents Homeschool?

Asking if all parents should homeschool is similar to asking if all people should be on a basketball team. Not everyone has the talent to do so, but those who do should definitely exercise it. I believe that homeschooling is the best choice when parents are able to sufficiently educate the children and have the dedication it takes to do so. But, just like all people do not make great parents, athletes, or singers, not all people make great homeschool teachers.

How Do I Know if I'm the Right Parent for the Job?

If you can remain dedicated to doing what's best for your child's education you may be able to homeschool. Research to see what other homeschoolers are doing and ask yourself if you can do similar things. You may consider the following questions. Do I have patience for teaching my child? Will I be sure to find proper resources when I don't know a lesson my child needs to learn? Can I keep my child involved in social activities? Those are just some of the many things you will need to think about. There is no exact formula of determining who should homeschool. However, doing research and thinking about what's involved and whether it works for your family and situation can help.

*I originally published a version of this via Yahoo Contributor Network

Homeschooling to Get Positive Social Interaction?

1/13/2015

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A New Look at Socialization Skills Within a Homeschool

by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

For so many years, choosing to educate children from home was looked at as stripping away their social interaction. However, many homeschooling families will argue with that fact, and for good reason.

How Can Homeschooled Children Make & Find Friends?

Some people might assume that because children homeschool, they will not have any friends. This is simply not true. Friends can be made from your neighborhood, an extra class, at the park, at the museum, within your own extended family, and various other avenues. A public school is not the only place one can acquire a friend.

Homeschooled children are allowed to call and play with their friends, just as a publicly or privately schooled child would. It is no different. There are birthday parties, slumber parties, shopping trips, and more - all the activities traditionally schooled friends do as well.

How is it Possible to Get Social Interaction During Homeschool?

In many homeschooling families, extra steps are taken to be sure that socialization is included, which means there is researching to be done on the parent's part for the methods and sometimes extra classes that will provide this.

This research often leads to finding solutions that focus on positive interaction with others because any good method will focus on the positive, rather than the negative. Social interaction is also given special attention, thus making socialization greatly important to a homeschooling family.

Positive Social Skills VS Negative Socialization

This special attention mentioned above often isn't given in public or private school because it is sometimes assumed that since the children are with other children all day, they are socializing well. However, this assumption shouldn't always be made. All socialization isn't positive. It can be negative as well. This is a fact looked over by many.

While some teachers do provide some great character development and social instruction in public school, which they are to be commended for, the children are often greatly influenced by each other. This comes naturally, as they desire to fit in. Also, it is simply just fun for them to relate with each other, which is certainly okay when that relating isn't negative.

During recess, the children are within sight of the teachers, but not always within earshot or in immediate reach, which can lead to some of them using inappropriate language or behaviors. The others either tell them they don't like those words or actions or they repeat them.

Now all the children that were in that general area have heard that language or seen that behavior and some will want to use it -- and they will. This, in turn, spreads the negative action to even more kids, cycling and creating a viral pattern. Pretty soon it will get to most of the children who are in the same age range.

Another reason that viral cycle happens is that once a certain number of kids are doing something, others begin to view it as okay. It becomes more accepted because they are used to seeing it and it doesn't even cross some of their minds that it might be wrong.

Perhaps if children were taught from the beginning how to interact positively, rather than negatively, some of these problems wouldn't exist later in life, which brings me back to homeschooling.

Extra Effort Can Make a Difference in the Quality of Social Skills

The main difference I’ve seen with homeschool socialization and public school socialization is the fact that in homeschool, much more effort is put into developing social skills, because of the fact that children may not be with other children all day (unless they have siblings). The fact that parents know other children aren't present -- and the effort put in to make up for that -- often makes for a child who is more likely to interact with most people in a positive way.

One more reason that positive social interaction is often more readily learned in a homeschool setting is because homeschooled children will be exposed to people of all ages throughout the day. This makes for a much more diverse learning experience.

Importance of Mixed-Age Grouping for Social Skills

Even better, when there is more than one child in the family, working together is often a huge part of the schooling process, even in siblings that range in age. Some homeschooling families even teach from a mixed-age perspective, leading to a great deal of cooperation with each other.

Group cooperation is an important skill needed throughout life. Many colleges actively seek out home schooled children because of their exceptional social and educational abilities.

Making the Right Social Choices for Your Child Specifically

In closing, I will say that not all public school interaction is negative and not all homeschool interaction is positive. Ultimately, it is up to the parent to examine what situations are best for each individual child. Many children make it through public school fine, as do many in homeschool.

People should come to realize that socialization isn't about whether you choose school at home or utilize public school or other options, but about whether a positive environment is created for the child. If the social environment your child is in right now is not a positive one, it is time to consider other options.

Those options may or may not be completely switching the child's schooling style. It could be just doing it in a different way or finding creative ways to incorporate positive socialization.

Whatever method you choose, be sure it is one both you and your child will feel comfortable with.

*I originally published a version of this via Yahoo Contributor Network

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Questions Kids May Have when Switching to Unschooling

1/12/2015

Q & A on Discussing the Unschooling Homeschool Method with Kids

by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

Sometimes when switching to unschooling from a more traditional homeschooling method, your kids will have some questions. Here's some common questions kids have when faced with this new form of learning. The questions are accompanied by answers that may help them better understand what unschooling is all about.

Yay! Does That Mean I Don't Have to Learn Anymore?

No. Unschooling does not mean you won't be learning. It means that you will learn based on your strengths, weaknesses, and interests, rather than learning through a set curriculum. It can also mean you will learn through hands-on experience and play.

Can I Play All Day?

Well, you will be playing but you also will be learning. You can learn through play if learning is going on. It's most likely going to be more fun than learning in a more traditional way. Sometimes playing will help you learn your lessons and that's perfectly fine if it works for you.

Are we Still Going to Use Textbooks?

Unschooling doesn't necessarily mean textbooks and other materials won't be used. Just like any other teaching method, some unschoolers use textbooks and some may use other materials to teach with. When and how they are used will align better with the way each child learns and their individual readiness. So, you might use textbooks and you might not. Sometimes other books or other learning materials work best.

Do I Have to Sit at a Desk All Day?

No! You can if you learn well that way. But you can also do other things if they help you learn. Unschooling is about doing whatever works best for each kid. If blocks help you learn how to count, you can use them. If visiting a veterinary clinic helps you learn about an animal, you might get the chance to do that. But if reading a book at your desk helps you more, you can do that instead.

Do I Have to Learn All Subjects?

Yes. You still need to learn all subjects. But the order you do it in and how you do it might be different than what we did before. If you are enjoying a particular lesson, we might spend more time on that if you want to. If you aren't in the right frame of mind for another lesson, we might move on to the next and come back to it later when you are ready.

Will I Still have Grade Levels Like All My Friends?

Yes. You still will have grade levels. However, the order that you do things in might be different than what they do. You will still graduate at the same time if you earn your way there - just like any other type of learning. Unschooling is just a way to make learning more fun for you and allow you to focus on things you are most interested in to help you succeed in life.

*I originally published a version of this via Yahoo Contributor Network

Ask Lyn About Homeschool: Discipline During School Hours

1/8/2015

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Do You Discipline Kids Like a Teacher Would or Like a Parent?

by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

Often, readers and friends ask me questions and share their concerns about homeschool via my Ask Lyn page and other methods. Ann Olson asked: "What's your view about disciplining children while you're homeschooling them? What do you do if they misbehave? Do you discipline them like a teacher would or like a parent would?" My simple answer to Ann is both. There are several reasons for this.

How Do I Discipline My Kids During Homeschool?

I can't speak for all homeschoolers, only for myself. Just like anyone else, they will each have their own way of doing things. Personally, I use positive parenting methods both during homeschool and just in general. Positive parenting in simple terms is using methodology and strategies that somehow benefit the child positively. This does not mean there are no consequences for actions, however, as that would not result in a positive outcome. One example of a positive parenting method is reflected in "Using Songwriting to Help Kids Relieve Stress." It can be used as a way to reflect on negative behaviors and consequences, but also is a positive way for a child to release any pent up feelings.

Each situation will warrant a different type of reaction or consequence. For instance, a child who accidentally spills glue on the floor is not going to get the same treatment as one who says or does something hurtful to a sibling during class. While a teacher may send a child to the principal for the latter, a homeschool parent may instead have the child hug and apologize and possibly give a punishment, depending on the situation. Of course a teacher might also do the latter.

Should You Discipline Kids Like a Teacher or Parent During Homeschool?

In retrospect, disciplining homeschooled kids like a teacher during school hours may help a child in homeschool distinguish between school time and other times. But this won't always be the case. It actually depends more on the parenting and teaching strategies being compared. Not every teacher or every parent disciplines the same. The traditional school teacher and homeschool teacher could have different teaching strategies. Although, they could be the same as well. A teacher in a traditional school might also use the positive parenting method that I mentioned. It's less about disciplining like a parent or teacher and more about figuring out which type of discipline may be needed in each unique situation.

Which Method for Discipline During Homeschool is Correct?

The correct method is the one that works best for each family. Not every family, every child, or every situation is going to be the same. There are benefits and drawbacks to disciplining a homeschooled child in certain ways, just as with any other. Knowing which discipline choice is correct in each unique situation is up to the parent to examine. This should be done, not necessarily thinking about whether it's being done as a parent or teacher, but whether the disciplinary action is what is best for the child in that situation.

Note: The author's positive parenting method has evolved into what she calls Upstream Parenting.

More from Lyn:

Positive Parenting Does Not Mean Zero Discipline
Guide to Positive Discipline for Children

*I originally published a version of this via Yahoo Contributor Network

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Homeschool: Are You the Right Parent for the Job?

Should Every Parent Homeschool?

Homeschooling to Get Positive Social Interaction?

A New Look at Socialization Skills Within a Homeschool

Questions Kids May Have when Switching to Unschooling

Q & A on Discussing the Unschooling Homeschool Method with Kids

Ask Lyn About Homeschool: Discipline During School Hours

Do You Discipline Kids Like a Teacher Would or Like a Parent?

Heart 'N Mind Homeschool Journal

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